Recent Polls show Polled People tell Polsters the Truth!
Pollsters, when polling other pollsters about polls, said that one hundred eighty one zillion percent of respondants, out of a sample of Mr. Zogby and Mr. Gallup and six of his employees, trust polls absolutely, since they are utterly and scientifically accurate.
In fact, the polls are so accurate, that Hari Seldon has devised, based on these polls, a system of predicting future events over the next thousand years of galactic history, so that he can stash recordings now telling people centuries in the future how to buy stocks and what color socks to wear. Wow. That is accuracy! In other news, weather predictions for the next four hundred years, based on computer models of a version of Earth with no clouds whose sun never changes temperature output, shows a rise in the seawater temperature of one degree. We can predict the weather five centuries before hand, but cannot tell you if it will rain tomorrow.
And in other news, the most highly rated TV show of all time was a documentary called ‘The Neilsen Families: a Look at the Families behind the Neilsen ratings!’
That was a joke. This is in earnest:
http://dirtyharrysplace.com/?p=5445
A refresher:
1. The corrupt liberal media always under polls Republicans. Election after election after election… Whether we win or lose, the outcome’s always the same: Republicans get more votes than the polls said they would.
2. This year pollsters all have it for Obama because all of them assume a record turnout of Democrats unlike anything seen since Watergate. Re-weight these polls to historical norms and you have a 2-3 point race. In other words: doable.
3. The corrupt liberal media has called 2008 over on every news show and in every newspaper for weeks now. This is to suppress your vote. This is an abuse of power. This is a threat to liberty.
4. In 2000, the corrupt liberal media knew the very conservative panhandle of Florida was in the central time zone and still they called the state early for Al Gore. In response, conservatives still in line to vote for Bush went home. Thousands of them. Look how close the corrupt liberal media came to stealing that election.
5. In 2004, the afternoon of election day, the corrupt liberal media leaked absurd exit polls showing Kerry shellacking Bush. Again, an intentional leak designed to demoralize and dishearten conservatives and keep us home.
For those of you on the left ready to accuse me of hyperbole, please do list your examples of when it was the other way around.
Please do not listen to premature announcements of an Obama victory, which we have been hearing since 2006. When weighed correctly, the polls show a tie or near-tie, and the news media reports this as a two-digit spread favoring Obama.
Please vote.
It would be nice to surprise the establishment. I for one am sick unto death of having an arrogant news media composed mostly or entirely of people more mentally inert or more morally corrupt than I am*, telling me what is good for me.
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* FOOTNOTE: I am no saint, God knows, and my sins are many and revolting. But at least, thank God, I do not tell lies for pay.
About John C Wright
John C. Wright is a practicing philosopher, a retired attorney, newspaperman, and newspaper editor, and a published author of science fiction. Once a Houyhnhnm, he was expelled from the august ranks of purely rational beings when he fell in love; but retains an honorary title.
